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  • Who are you, what do you do, and why should I care? 

Good question! A little feelings-hurty at the end there, but I like your style. Short version: I’m an alien living in disguise on this abysmal rock and I want to make my living by writing words on paper so you can stare at the corpses of trees and hallucinate vividly for hours. As for why you should care? I’m a Virgo, so I will be extremely critical if you don’t care. So in the words of a twelve-year-old Neopets junkie, nyeh.

  • So you’re an author. What do you write?

Just gonna ignore the alien-living-as-a-human thing, huh? Up to you. I wrote a mystery novel called Stitches. Here’s the blurb: “Stitches follows Jim Wolfe, a PTSD-riddled Army Ranger turned private investigator. Between his questionable relationship with a Romanian restaurateur’s son, and investigating the disappearance of a famous musician’s daughter with his partner, Scarlett Vaughn, Wolfe has a lot on his plate. When a string of grisly murders centering on college students grab the city of Boston by the throat, Wolfe finds himself entangled in more than one mystery. While Wolfe and his partner attempt to unravel the threads connecting the killings to their missing rock n’ roll heiress, Sebastian Codreanu discovers how deeply his father is tied to the recent crime spree, and the Mass Art Murderer plots his masterpiece. Everything is not what it first appears to be, and everyone has a secret.”

  • Cool! Where can I buy it?

You can order Stitches in paperback or for Kindle from Amazon! Kindle is $2.99 (or FREE if you have Kindle Unlimited), paperbacks are $14.99. (Prices are USD.) ((If you live outside the United States, try going to your country’s Amazon site and searching for “stitches samantha simard”!))

P.S., if you live in the New Hampshire/Massachusetts/Maine area of the US, you can buy a paperback copy of STITCHES at the following indie bookstores and support them and me at the same time: 

RiverRun Bookstore in Portsmouth NH

Print: A Bookstore in Portland ME

Andover Bookstore in Andover MA 

Spirit of ‘76 Bookstore in Marblehead MA

  • Where can I follow you to keep up with the hype?

I talk about this a lot, so you asking makes me think you’re not following me on FacebookTwitter, and/or Instagram. That last one is for pictures, but I post some Quality Content over there, including memes and cat pictures. I also have a Ko-Fi page if you’re feeling generous.

  • Are you writing a sequel?

HELL YEAH MY DUDE! SCAR TISSUE has a publish date of I Don’t Know Yet but it’ll feature all the characters you know and love and introduce you to some more!!!